Articles to Read in this Directory:


Baby gift ideas
Baby Lullaby

Baby Jewelry Keepsake

Celebrate Your Wedding Anniversary

Baby Shower Gift Ideas

Baby Shower Hostess Gifts

Baby Shower Hosting 101

Baby Shower Planning and Hosting

5 Essential Baby Shower Gifts

Easy Affordable Shower Decorations

Here's What to expect at a Baby Shower.

How to make a lovely baby shower cake

Shopping for Babies and Infants

Top 2 Tips for Getting That Perfect Gift

Top Ten Money Saving Wedding Tips

Types of Baby Shower Invitations

Party Favors Brighten Up Any Party!

A Daddy Baby Shower

A Surprise Baby Shower

Add Warmth To Your Baby Shower

Baby Boy Clip Art to liven up your Baby

Baby Clipart for all your Baby Shower

Baby Clothes for Your Baby Shower Gift

Baby Gift Registry

Baby Girl Clip Art

Baby Girl Shower Invitations

Baby Shower Cake as the Centerpiece

Baby Shower Planning Checklist

Baby Shower ChecklistHostess

Baby Shower Decorations

Baby Shower Etiquette

Baby Shower Favor Ideas

Baby Shower Favors

Baby Shower Food Items

Baby Shower Mom & the Ladies

Baby Shower for Second Baby

Baby Shower for Twins Or More

Baby Shower Game Distractions

Baby Shower Games

Baby Shower Gift for Dads

Baby Shower Gift Ideas

Baby Shower Gift Registry

Baby Shower Gifts

Baby Shower Gifts

10 Easy Baby Shower Steps

Baby Shower Hostess Etiquette

Baby Shower Invitation Cards

Baby Shower Invitation Wording

Baby Shower Invitations Ideas

Baby Shower On a Budget

Baby Shower Party Decorations

Baby Shower Party Games

Baby Shower Recipe Ideas

Baby Shower Recipes

Baby Shower the Celebration of Life

Baby Shower Themes

Novel Way for Baby Shower

Baby Showers 101

Baby Showers For Adopted Children

Long Distance Baby Shower

How To Save Money on Parties

Throw a Baby Shower on a Budget

Planning a Baby Shower

Selecting a Baby Shower Theme

Top Cookie Flavors

Welcoming an Adopted Baby


More Article Directories

Main Articles Page
Preemie News
Baby Medical Issues
Baby Names
Baby Needs
Baby Shower & Gifts
Parenting
Pregnancy & Health


Lily of My Heart
Website Navigation

Lily's Home Page

Read Lily's Story

Lily's Photo Gallery

What is a Preemie?

Preemie Parents
Helpful Links Page


Information Articles

Prematurity Prevention
and
Research Donations


Our Baby Store

The Preemie Parent Question:
What Did I Do Wrong?


 by: Laura

When a baby is born extremely premature, prior to 30 weeks, it is normal for everyone to ask why. What happened? Often there are no answers. For the mother of a micro-preemie (a child born weighing less than 1 3/4 pounds) it can be torture.

Mothers bear a special responsibility and burden during pregnancy. Even the most cautious and attentive women can have something mysteriously go wrong. We can be under a doctor's care and still get broadsided with an infection or illness from out of no where.

I met many mothers of extremely premature babies while in the NICU with our premature daughter, Lily, who was born at 25 weeks gestation. Speaking with these mothers openned my eyes to realizing we were all doubting ourselves and our worthiness as mothers, and that as hard as it was to accept, there was no simple answer. None of us had done anything to cause our children to be born early, though every one of us wondered and accused ourselves.

One young mother was mentally beating herself up because she had danced ONE dance on her birthday and the cord was wrapped around the baby's neck. Her grief was so extreme that I asked a counselor to speak with her. Despite our condolences, she still felt it was her fault somehow.

I understand her only too well. A few days after our daughter was born, it was discovered that I had a massive infection in my placenta. The doctor's could not explain how it got there. I felt as dirty. What did I do to deserve this? I wanted answers. How does this happen? But there were no answers.

The good news was that my body was actually doing what it was supposed to do. My baby was born early so that she wouldn't be infected. If she had stayed in any longer, she would have gotten an acute necrotizing virus and been stillborn. This news did not relieve my self doubts however.

Well meaning friends and relatives do not ease the self-guilt with questions of "Do they have an answer yet?" or comments such as "Lay still and keep your legs together." People do not realize how hurtful their attempts at humor can be. I'm facing the life and death of my child, and someone is making jokes?

With the exception of one unfit mother who did cocaine while pregnant (her baby died after 5 months in the NICU...Rest in Peace, little Dusty Rose), it is fair to say that none of the mothers I meant deserved the anguish they inflicted on themselves. It is sad we were robbed of the joy of being new mothers.

However, we were now mothers. Every one of us could now look at a little being and feel unconditional love. We are so fortunate that we live in a time when there is such excellent medical care for premature infants.

Some people wonder whether it is correct to keep a child born prior to 25 weeks gestation alive when the odds are so heavily against their having a healthy full life. I myself wondered if it was fair to keep my daughter alive hooked up to all those machines. But the answer is oh so obvious. Yes.

Lily had a 65% chance of surviving and a 90% chance of severe complications. But she is the exception, the survivor and thriver. There is no doubt now that we made the correct decision. Today, Lily is a happy and perfectly healthy 20 pound baby who will be celebrating her first birthday in 3 weeks.

Her smile is worth everything.



Author Resource:-> www.lilyofmyheart.com

Article From Article Emporium


Lily of My Heart
is licensed in the State of Wisconsin
PO Box 763
Plover, WI 54467

Contact us at Laura@Lilyofmyheart.com


Thank you and please visit us again soon.






© - All Rights Reserved